I'm sure by now that those of you who poke around on other people's personal sites are familiar with "The Mirror Project". And quite a few of you have probably seen links to something called "The Foot Project". (I'm not going to link to them, kidz. You can find them yourselves if you put 1/8 of an ounce [or its metric equivalent] of energy into doing a simple search.)
I participate in neither, and don't plan to do so either. It's not that I have anything against mirrors; in fact, I tend to check myself out in any and all reflective surfaces, including spoons, puddles, and other people's sunglasses. I do, however, have a "thing" about -- or should I say against -- feet, because most of those that I've seen displayed should only be viewed in the privacy of their owners' own homes with the shades drawn, if at all.
My own feet, I must proudly admit, are really quite lovely. But still, I have no desire to share them with the cyberworld at large. If you really want to see my toes, then visit me. We'll have lunch, we'll get some good iced coffee, we'll hang in the park, and I'll wear one of my many pairs of stunningly stylish sandals. But ask me to take a picture of them and have them posted on someone else's site? No thanks. I'll pass.
I have decided, however, that I don't want to be a total spoilsport. I've decided that if I won't join in the voyeuristic/exhibitionistic fun on other people's sites, I'll be enterprising myself and start my own Project. (It's important to have a hobby -- and this ship-in-a-bottle nonsense isn't all it's cracked up to be.) So I happily, and with more than just a smidgeon of pride, introduce you to my Project, and heartily invite you to participate.
I'm calling my endeavor The Hole Picture. And what I want from you is this (and please bear with me, as the details of this vast undertaking are still in their pupal state): Send me a picture of your most cherished hole. Yes, that's right. Hole. It can be a golf hole, a clothing hole, a pothole, a hole in my bucket dear Liza dear Liza, or even an orifice. Have fun. Be creative. But don't be an asshole. And don't send me pictures of yours to prove you are one.
I know that by asking for this, I may be really "asking for it". And I know that I'm bound to receive some pretty asinine submissions. But believe me, a lack of originality submerged in banal juvenility won't phase me. Or shock me. I won't think it's cute. I won't acknowledge you or your submission. I won't even do you the honor of excoriating you on this site. I will only delete your submission posthaste and immediately, if not sooner, and it will find its way into the Black Hole of the universe and nowhere near the jodiverse.
fresh-baked at 04:28 PMI'm not sure yet. I'm still "exploring" different ways to display this stuff, which means it will be available for public consumption sometime around, oh, I'd say, November 2004.
Offered by: Jodi on June 29, 2002 5:32 PMWhere may we view the submissions?
Offered by: Tess on June 29, 2002 4:24 PMLynn, don't quit posting comments. If it makes you feel any better, I didn't even notice the misspelling in your first comment ... not even after you pointed it out in your second. I had to read it several times before I caught it. I suppose that sometimes the eye only sees what it knows "should" be there and doesn't pick up the error.
Offered by: Jodi on June 24, 2002 12:29 AMOh DAMMIT DAMMIT DAMMIT!!! I hate when I mis-spell something really really simple. And I KNOW better! It's just that my fingers type faster than my brain thinks and ..... well never mind I'm probably just digging myself in deeper. I'm going to quit posting comments.
Offered by: Lynn on June 22, 2002 11:34 AMMy first thought upon reading about your Hole Project, was the hole in the middle of one of my favorite CDs but I don't have a digital camera and I would be too embarrassed to send a role of film to be developed with a picture of a hole on it. What would they think?!
Offered by: Lynn on June 22, 2002 11:31 AMJodi:
If your hole has rash near it would you be best not making any decisions about a sub[e]mission?
(Apologies to e.e.cummings, and everybody else.)
Offered by: Don on June 22, 2002 2:45 AMOK. Because you're so purdy, Kelly, and because I like your enthusiasm, The Hole Picture project will be realized. It won't just remain a ridiculous idea ... it'll become a ridiculous reality!
Offered by: Jodi on June 21, 2002 7:03 PMOh, no ... it must happen. I need to make a small purchase, take the photo and do a write up. But it will happen.
Offered by: Kelly on June 21, 2002 4:05 PMMy goodness, Jodi. Your cheek has been seen bulging all over town lately! Should we be concerned?
Offered by: Kim on June 21, 2002 11:31 AMOoooh, you're all so cute, I just want to scoop you up in my arms like tiny puppies and inhale your fresh, warm, squirmy puppiness! *woof*
Offered by: Jodi on June 21, 2002 10:56 AMI know what I'm going to use!!
I know what I'm going to use!!
I know what I'm going to use!!
:)
Offered by: aaron on June 21, 2002 9:45 AMKim is always calling me a "hole," Jodi. What if she submitted a picture of me?
Offered by: Scott on June 21, 2002 7:26 AMKelly!
I orginally sort of intended this entry to be, uh, "tongue in cheek", but I'm TICKLED that you'd want to contribute. So now I'm going to forge ahead. Let's see if I have a shred of an inkling of an iota of an idea what to do once I actually get a submission. (I like your confident use of "we", by the way.)
And speaking of which ... yeah, a "(w)hole" back story would be great. A little history is a good thing.
Offered by: Jodi on June 20, 2002 11:25 PMI can say with a reasonably high degree of certainty that I know *exactly* what I'm going to use.
Now ... do we just send the photo, or do we need to give you the 'whole' back story on why we chose it?
Offered by: Kelly on June 20, 2002 9:24 PMKelly, don't make any rash decisions. I want you to give it a hole lot of thought first.
Offered by: Jodi on June 20, 2002 7:11 PMLOL. I like it and I may even make it the first "project" in which I've participated. Better than feet for god's sake.
(walks away ... pondering)
Offered by: Kelly on June 20, 2002 6:53 PMThe Foot Project? Barf. I'd rather see all the orifices that get sent your way.
Offered by: daegan on June 20, 2002 5:33 PM
