On my way home from the gym yesterday morning (fitness never rests!), I almost tripped over this lethargic lump loungin' on the curb:
A police car passed and then backed up. The officer asked him what he was doing. What do you think he said? (Yes, this is an invitation for you to comment. Consider it my holiday gift to you. No purchase necessary. Offer good until I decide to take it away.)
P.S. Yes, I've already noticed how, from this angle, the hydrant looks quite genitalic emerging from between his legs. Oh yes.
My first thought was that maybe he was trying to hold that parking spot for a friend, but he's next to a hydrant. Maybe he called the fire department and he's trying to conserve his energy while he waits for help to arrive?
Offered by: BOB on June 5, 2004 8:06 PM"I think that cloud looks like a woman with a really fat ass. What do you think, officer?"
Offered by: Dan on June 3, 2004 8:28 PMMy guess, my first serious guess, is that he said something to the effect of, "Just sitting here, officer."
Offered by: Thomas on June 2, 2004 8:01 AMI'm not telling yet, anne.
Offered by: Jodi on June 1, 2004 10:50 PMso what did he really say?
Offered by: anne on June 1, 2004 6:34 PMI was going to say, "You mean this is a hydrant and NOT a ticketmaster?", but lynne beat me to the punch.
I could say, "Lying down.", but that wry sarcasm is rarely seen in you average "street lie-uponers."
Now, "Enjoying the feeling of the OTHER hydrant as I work it in and out of my sweet, sweet teenaged ass!", but 1) I'm not sure he is a teen, 2) a hydrant, no matter how enveloped in the rectal cavity, would still leave a larger bulge in his body, 3) if it were mounted* where his ass is located in the picture, it would be in violation of city ordinances and 4) it would be expected of me.
My reply is, "I was overcome by the sheer weight of a backpack shaped tumor growing on the back of my skull. My God; Is it noticable?"
*Mounted, like in where it's positioned in the concrete: Too close to the curb. I mean, if it were in his ass, it would most certainly qualify as being "mounted" in the most perverse, valve-release-nut**-Stimulating-the-prostate-into-an-explosive-chin-mussing-orgasm, kind of way.
**Release nut... heh
Offered by: Thomas on June 1, 2004 1:50 PM"Naughty, naughty, naughty! You filthy old soomka!"
Offered by: Cory on June 1, 2004 12:54 PM"Just waiting for the fireman to come hook his hose up."
Offered by: bob on June 1, 2004 12:30 PMDuuuude. Isn't this the line for Grateful Dead tickets?
Offered by: lynne on June 1, 2004 12:23 PM"Protesting capitalism. And waiting for the bus to take me to the mall."
Offered by: Melodee on May 31, 2004 11:27 PMWhat Beth said.
Offered by: Vendela on May 31, 2004 10:46 PMLooking up women's skirts.
Offered by: beth on May 31, 2004 10:40 PMIf you were carrying around a schlong THIS BIG, wouldn't you need to take a rest every so often?
Offered by: Da Goddess on May 31, 2004 10:39 PM"I've fallen, and I cant get up!"
Offered by: Traci on May 31, 2004 10:26 PM"I just met Jodi...and I felt so faint I had to lie down"
Offered by: sally on May 31, 2004 8:57 PM"Officer, isn't it obvious? I'm building a fence."
Here's the proof:
http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2004/03/0311_040311_biofence.html
Offered by: Graham Lester on May 31, 2004 5:57 PM"I just can't get enough of that high-quality Manhattan dog urine!"
Offered by: tim on May 31, 2004 5:05 PM"Just seemed like the curb needed some layin' on."
Offered by: Shar on May 31, 2004 4:38 PM"Trying to get on Jodi's blog!"
Offered by: Cody on May 31, 2004 2:34 PMTo quote a line from my all-time favorite movie (and I'll leave you to guess which one that is)...
"Maybe he was resting his eyes."
Offered by: Joni on May 31, 2004 2:23 PMpreparing for his curbside pelvic exam
Offered by: thomas on May 31, 2004 1:21 PM"I'm waitin' for Jodi to step over me wearing a skirt ..."
Offered by: Nils Ling on May 31, 2004 9:42 AM
