As promised this morning.
Yesterday I was in a jaunty mood and took a zippity-doo-dah walk along (and also in! and perhaps even through!) (it was a banner day, preposition-wise!) Riverside Park and met a couple of really groovy dogs. I will put their photos in the Dogabout gallery tonight, so be sure to check back.
My walk took me down Broadway, where I was stopped in my tracks by the sight of a beautiful bulldog. I mooshed his face long enough to appear relatively normal (which is more than I can say for the way I behaved with two dogs I'd met earlier, in the park) and asked his "dad" how old the dog was (one year). The dad then offered the information that the dog was a bulldog, which was like saying of an ice cream cone, "This is an ice cream cone."
Just as I was about to ask if I could take a photo of this pulchritudinous pup, I found out that his "dad" wasn't his dad. The man walking the dog was doing so for the dog's famous real dad. But because I figured that any request for a photo would now be refused, and because I did not want to seem like a celebrity-sniffing lunatic, I left my camera in my pocket. I knew that if I did so much as pull the flap aside and allow the light of day into the pocket, the camera would leap out with its little tophat and cane and do its usual tapdance routine until I had no choice but to let it take a picture.
I still wanted a photo, anyway. So I sort of hung around, about 20 feet from where the man and dog were standing (outside a Starbucks), my hand on the pocketed camera, occasionally looking at my watch so the guy wouldn't think I was lurking with the intent of trying to snap a secret photo with my hidden camera, but was just waiting around for a tardy friend. He looked over at me several times, but each time I glanced at the glass doors of the office building behind me as if waiting for that tardy friend to exit. I put on my best 'Jesus Christ, where is she?" face. Oh, dog-guy, I thought, I barely even know you're there anymore. I don't have all the time in the world for my fake friend to meet me for an imaginary lunch for which she's already late, so, really, you can leave for all I care!
Obviously my telepathy worked, and the man and dog walked past me ... just as I was on the phone with the DOG, telling him whose dog I'd just met. "They just passed me!" I said. Apparently I didn't say it as softly as I'd thought, because the man looked at me. And then stopped about ten feet away from me, on my right. On the opposite side of me from where the impatient camera laid in wait.
I ended my call, crossed my arms, gripped the camera in my left pocket with my right hand, and hid it under my elbow. Several times I depressed the "on" button and casually turned toward my subject to quickly snap a photo (and then run off into the crowd!), but every time I did so, the man magically looked over at me. What the hell was he looking at? Didn't he ever see a girl waiting outside an office building with her arms crossed before? Some people!
Eventually they started walking away, west on 52nd Street. I had to pretend I was still waiting for that friend, though, so I didn't leave my post for about 15 seconds. And then I walked off in dogged (heehaw!) pursuit of my subject. But by then the man and dog were already too far away, and I didn't dare run after them, barking. Instead, I just pulled out my camera, depressed the "on" button, zoomed in as far as I could, and took this horrible, fuzzy shot:
So here's the part where you participate (i.e. comment). I want you to tell me whose dog you think the bulldog is. I will give you four clues:
- The person is an actor.
- The person is a handsome man.
- I've met the handsome man actor in person. ("I've met him," I told the dog's walker, "and I don't know who's better-looking ... him or the dog!?" Then we LOL'd and the dog rolled his eyes at me and said, "Ha. Ha. Moron." My camera also pinched the hand that grabbed it in the pocket, and licked the word "Idiot" into my palm, sorta kinda like Helen Keller.)
- The dog's name is the actor's last name.
The first person to guess correctly wins a prize!*
* My admiration
Aack! I can't believe I didn't think of Paulie Baby, he of the salad dressing fame. Someone needs to get Jawja an autographed bottle of the stuff!
I loved him in "Hud," but I also really liked him playing opposite one of my favorite villainesses, Linda Fiorentino, in Where the Money Is (http://movie-reviews.colossus.net/movies/w/where_money.html)
And I guess the dog is summoned a la Seinfeld?
Hel-LO, NEW-man!
Offered by: Joni on April 4, 2005 10:17 PMI accept! Thank you, thank you.
Now to find a place in my trophy room to hang my shiny new admiration...
Offered by: jawjie on April 3, 2005 10:25 PMPlease accept my congratulations, Jawjie. And my ADMIRATION!
Offered by: Jodi on April 3, 2005 9:55 PMI AM THE CHAMPION!
Offered by: jawjie on April 3, 2005 3:48 PMJawjie: No, no, YES!!!, no, no!
Offered by: Jodi on April 3, 2005 8:10 AMWarren Beatty?
Richard Gere?
Paul Newman?
Pierce Brosnan?
Kevin Costner?
Older??? OK so how about SEAN CONNERY!
Offered by: Lolly on April 2, 2005 8:04 PM
I'm drunk. But not on alcohol. I'm high, but not on marijuana or cocaine or methamphetamine or whatever recreational drugs the kids are using these days. No, my intoxication is hardly so trite or banal. It is an intoxication that transcends your simple earthly notions of what intoxication is or even should be. If I cared, I would pity you. Fortunately, I do not know how to care, because I find pitying to be so distasteful. Don't you agree? (As if it matters whether or not you do. As. If.)
Lolly: Nice tries, but NO again.
Joni: Nope! But I *love* the Chris Walken and Ed Harris suggestions, because these guys aren't classically "handsome" ... yet I've always found both of them outrageously attractive. On the other hand -- Sean Combs? Uhmmm. No. No. No. And besides, what name would his dog go by? "Combs"? "Daddy"? "Diddy"?
CPR: Nope! You're the second person to suggest George Clooney. Nice try anyway.
Joni (again): Still no. (But yum ... Andy Garcia ...) Also: Have you forgotten my attitude toward my ex-husband, Nicolas Cage? See here. I think you were reading my site back then!
Joni (again again): You're doing very well with the guesses, insofar as suggesting handsome men, but still ... no.
Everyone: Think older.
Offered by: Jodi on April 2, 2005 5:17 PMI know who it is {{slaps forehead}} -- serve me up a heaping helping of that Jo-deration! (Jodi Adoration!)
Robert DeNiro
Uh-huh!
???
Offered by: Joni on April 2, 2005 4:24 PMAargh! This is driving me crazy, like I song name I can't recall!
Is it
Nicolas Cage?
Andy Garcia?
Michael Douglas?
I guess George Clooney, for his bulldog "lou"? At least rhymes with "Cloo"ney (?)
http://www.clooneyfiles.com/facts/index.shtml
Offered by: cpr on April 2, 2005 3:28 PMHmm. I'll throw these out:
Sean Combs
Benjamin Bratt
Matt Damon
Chris Walken
Al Pacino
Kevin Spacey
Mel Gibson
Brad Pitt
John Travolta
Ed Harris
Any of the Baldwin Boys
Three more guesses.........
1. Denzel Washington
2. Harrison Ford
3. Christian Slater
Sandler
Offered by: kini on April 1, 2005 9:56 AMTim Robbins?
Lolly: Decent suggestions. But a dog named "Ripa" would just be weird.
Vendela: Ew.
Deb: Nope to both, but good guess re: Bruce Willis. (He actually gave my dog, Taxi, a "thumbs up" a few years ago when he saw him while on a break from filming a movie in Philadelphia.) As far as Matthew Broderick goes ... uhmmm, ever since I saw him in "Taller Than A Dwarf" on Broadway a few years ago, I've had a hard time thinking of him as an actor.
Jeffrey: (See response to Vendela.)
TFPKC: LOL!
Aaron: Erik Estrada is as handsome as Regis Philbin. Also, informericals don't count as acting.
Tim: Oddly enough, I do find John Malkovich handsome. But no.
Offered by: Jodi on April 1, 2005 9:10 AMMalkovich? Malkovich, malkovich malkovich malkovich, malkovich malkovich, malkovich malkovich. Malkovich, malkovich malkovich malkovich malkovich malkovich. Malkovich!
Offered by: tim on April 1, 2005 8:49 AMThe dog's name is Estrada.
Offered by: aaron on April 1, 2005 7:59 AM
Will Beckham ditch Real Madrid? Is the paparazzi claim just a pretext? Does he have his sights set on Chelsea? Will Mourinho have him? These questions keep many awake at night. But not us. Because we are GOD DAMN AMERICANS! AMERICANS DON'T WORRY ABOUT SOME EURO PRETTY BOY "SPORT." We worry about important things. Like mustard. Cancer. Prancing. Unicorns. That sort of thing.
The actor is either Kevin Fido or Antonio Rover.
Offered by: That Fancy Prancey Kitty Cat on March 31, 2005 11:42 PMMICHAEL MUSTO?
Offered by: Jeffrey on March 31, 2005 10:05 PMWell Darn!
I can't let it go-must guess again and errr...again.
1. Bruce Willis
2. Matthew Broderick
I think Regis is HOT!
Offered by: Vendela on March 31, 2005 8:50 PMCan I guess more than once?
My picks:
1. Colin Farrell
2. John Stamos
3. Kelly Ripa (not a man ... OR IS SHE??? LOL!)
Hanuman: Good guess, but no!
Deb: Handsome fella, but nyet!
Vendela: See clue #2. And then take a look at the guy you name!
Offered by: Jodi on March 31, 2005 7:36 PMGeorge Clooney?
Offered by: Deb on March 31, 2005 7:29 PMPhilbin?
Offered by: Vendela on March 31, 2005 7:12 PMCould it be Keanu Reeves?!!!
Offered by: Hanuman on March 31, 2005 4:38 PM
