OK, so remember how Suave's advertising used to always taunt us with their "We'll never tell" campaign? They'd show two lovely ladies with gleaming tresses, one of whom used Suave and one of whom used a more expensive shampoo, and we, the envious straw-haired masses, would marvel that both achieved the same result. Suave never let us in on who used what, much to the hair-pulling dismay of some of us. Well, that's all in the past now. That dose of 'do delight has gone the way of the dodo. It's so ... dis-tressing.
Now Suave has decided to demystify everything it worked so long and hard to achieve, and is inviting the world to play along. I refuse, on nostalgic grounds. At least openly. Secretly, of course, I will be taking the challenge in about two minutes. (I guess it's not a secret anymore, then, is it? IS IT?) I'm already anxious about it.
All of that, leading up to this: I invite you to guess which of the following seven things I actually said today:
- If you love the squeegee so much, why don't you marry it?
- Your name is mud, buster.
- If the shoe fits, buy it in every color ... even if it's not on sale!
- Did they just, like, invent French Bulldogs in the past three years? Is that why I've never seen an old one?
- Where are the fucking Brillo pads?
- It ain't easy being green.
- You're the soy creamer in my iced coffee.
I am giving you the opportunity to comment ... so run with it!
And of course, regarding the real answer: I'll never tell.
Hasn't she used that sound clip before? Why, yes. Yes, she has. (Bonus points if anyone can identify the movie from whence that singsong line came.)
fresh-baked at 11:52 AM
You said all 7 because none of them suck and you, above every other so called bon-mot, would have used each in the most appropriate way possible.
Now, if you would only say, "Thomas, mon petite pamplemousse, run away with me to the day spa for an entoxicating afternoon of exfoliation and raw animal sex, sometimes simultaneously."
Oh yeah, babe: I'll be your "happy ending."
Offered by: Thomas on July 20, 2005 1:00 PMI told you kids I'd never tell.
Offered by: Jodi on July 20, 2005 8:51 AMI'm going to go out on a limb here and say that I think you said all of these things in a day's time. Well?
Offered by: Scott on July 19, 2005 4:45 PMI'm guessing 1, 4, and 5.
But I'm just guessing. :)
I wish you had comments open more often. :D
Offered by: Mia on July 18, 2005 4:31 PMdefinitely, definitely, #'s 1, 2, 4, 5. and possibly 7. but only if the mood in #'s 1, 2, 4, and 5 was magically broken at some point during the day.
Offered by: Sarcomical on July 18, 2005 3:44 PMSince number five sounds loud and clear, it must be me, not Jodi, bitching for the Brillo pads. Jodi commented on the French Bulldog.
Offered by: Scamp on July 18, 2005 9:30 AMWell .. time to put my deductive reasoning and encyclopaedic knowledge of all things Jodi to work.
#1. No, you dit-int say that. Because you do not drive a car.
#2. Very Mae West, but no, I think not. No expletives, and were the Jodi I know angry enough, she would have turned the air a stylish but subtle shade of blue.
#3. While it is a very Jodi thing to think, it seems a bit clumsy to trip easily off our clever little quipster's talented tongue.
#4. This seems like the Jodi I know - a dollop of wonder, a pinch of puzzlement, and a heapin' helpin' o' doggie love.
#5. A possibility. But ... do they even make Brillo pads any more? Possibly. Would Jodi buy them? I don't believe so. So I'm going to say "No".
#6. Possible, under the most serendipitous of circumstances. It would be a wonderfully clever thing to pop out with if, for example, a jealous former lover were to spot you on the street with another man, and rush over to confront you - not looking both ways - and was crushed under the wheels of a bus. Jodi would look sadly down at his mangled corpse, wink playfully at the bus driver, and say. "Poor jealous man - it ain't easy being green." And all would have a merry laugh while waiting for the coronoer's wagon. But otherwise ... no. So I'll go with "no".
#7. No, no, no. That's so not Jodi. It speaks of a sappy romanticism and lack of sophistication.
By deduction, then, #4 was the easy choice, and I'll go so far as to say #5 and #6 are theoretically possible, but unlikely.
And what she has NOT said in a long time is "Hello!"
Offered by: Nils on July 18, 2005 9:16 AM#4 and #5
Offered by: browneye on July 16, 2005 1:11 AM#1. Because everyone loves the word "squeegee!"
Offered by: Vendela on July 16, 2005 12:51 AMI'm guessing #5 or #7. I was going to pick #3, but that's just too Sex In The City.
Offered by: John in Denver on July 15, 2005 6:39 PMi'm guessing the French Bulldog thing - there are NEVER any old ones around, and it disturbs me a little...
and the movie is "don't say a word", which i refused to see based on that annoying line.
Just the first one. I think you've gone off on a bit of a flight of fancy with the rest of them.
Offered by: Pete on July 15, 2005 2:07 PMAll of them. The weird part was, you were at the gynecologist's.
Please forgive me.
Offered by: tim on July 15, 2005 1:14 PMI'm just commenting because I can, and to thank you for always posting dog pics. :)
Offered by: Drunken Lagomorph on July 15, 2005 12:44 PMI say you said number 4! I LOVE those dogs! :-)
Offered by: Lolly on July 15, 2005 12:06 PMI'm assuming that it's #5 (and the quote is from the abysmal movie "Don't Say a Word"!!!)
Offered by: Hanuman on July 15, 2005 12:01 PM
