I abhor awards shows, but still I found myself watching the 78th Annual Academy Awards® last night. Even though I was invited to a super-swanky red carpet-type shindig, I chose to stay home, because I am fairly certain my at-home ensemble would have raised a carefully groomed eyebrow or two if transplanted into a non-home environment.

Here are my observations:

• Heath Ledger was chewing gum. :-(
• Charlize Theron's dress had an unfortunate bow-poof thing on its left shoulder.
• Salma Hayek seemed to be speaking extra-Spanish-accenty on purpose.

Yes. That is all.