I'm sure Jodi would be willing, provided we all examine it professionally and evaluate her performance. Of course no clinical trial would be complete without studying several syrupy samplings of her touted tonsorial talents.

My engine's over heating...need a lube job.

*gulp*

Excuse me ... is it hot in here or is it ... jamied???

Jodiverse: Come for the Jewishness, stay for the raunch.

Oh yeah, ummm Jodi? My back, while of course can't compare to yours, is getting pretty damned muscular if you ever change your mind and let me be that unseen girl to slide those fire engine red hot nails down. Oh wait. That would be my back, your hands, so you'd be the unseen girl...and as teeny tiny as you are, I think that would work if you take off your surgicly implanted stiletto's and squat down to my teeny tiny height.

Thomas, I'd pay a considerable amount more than $19.95 to witness you "handling" His Supreme Alphaness, Ds. I regretfully have to inform you, though, that Ds would not, under any circumstances, provide ANYONE handling...anyone.

Ever.

Never.

Ever.

I was beginning to wonder why Mr. Token Fella wasn't jumping in to give me the fuel I needed to get on Jodi's hood and give her the wax job that Ds and Thomas apparently wish to witness. As much as Jodi claims to be disgusted with "snatch" I'm hoping that her love for pain over rides that.

Roasted, you have no fucking clue just how stupid you just sounded.

Ds, I'll go in with you on the $19.95 for the tape.

You'll have to pay for the shipping but, with Jodi seemingly looking at us while biting her lower lip, we could work on each other's handling during the playback.

I mean, we made our peace a while ago, so I figured I should offer out the olive branch.

I should see a doctor about that discoloring.

Jodi-on-Jodi sex. Now that opens up a whole new realm of fetish possibilities...

And if jamied and Jodi are going to swap carnuba wax treatments, I hope token fella is gentleman enough to videotape the buffing and waxing and polishing... Then wise enough to offer it here on Jodi's site for a mere $19.95 plus shipping and handling...

With a portion going to a charity that helps those that can't drive full-size American cars, of course...

Jeffrey: In all egotistic immodesty, the most well-muscled back I know belongs to ME! So now you must imagine me doing that thing that Ralph Malph used to do -- where he'd turn his back to his friends, wrap his arms around himself, and pretend to be makin' out with an unseen girl.

Roasted: Grandma? WTF?

Token fella: You are very wise. Also, you have exquisite taste in girlfriends and cars.

Of course I would encourage jamied to get at any part of you you'd be willing to expose. And I expect that if I took any steps to stop innuendo, there would be a revolt on the site. However, it also seems a bad idea to participate, since innuendo has a completely different meaning, as well as spelling.

Whose grandma in the picture? Yech

I can just picture those nails sliding menacingly but oh-so-delightfully down someone's well-muscled back. Oh, you minx, you.

I can't believe my boyfriend, whose car this is, hasn't stepped up to defend my honor in the face of all this innuendo or to support sweet little jamied in her quest to do more than just make out with me. Perhaps he thinks he is being poetic by taking a hands-off approach, given my hands-on posture here? I don't know. I just don't know. Hrrmph, bah, and so on.

The car is thinking, "Jodi.... Jodi.... Search the internet for optional uses of my gear shift..."

Which does turn up several videos... I watched them for research purposes only, of course.

It's fine, Jodi, I came back to the picture of your hands before had my "happy ending." I wouldn't cheat on you like that.

It's a Jewish Vulcan Mini Mind Meld...

I bet I know what the car is thinking....

I can't believe no one's made a "hand job" joke... but I guess that would be too easy. Have a nice Labor Day weekend!

I'd much rather make his trunk red than make any of his parts blue...that's no fun for anybody.

As for you, Jodes, even though you didn't make out with me when you had the chance, my offer still stands to do a lot more to you than just make you blush. ;-*

Jamie: Shucks! The car and I are blushing. Look how red you made him.

Thomas and Ds: Zip it re: Jamie making him red. Also, I am keeping my mouth shut vis-a-vis your well-written lewd comments.

Deb: One's pedicure should always be some shade of red. Life is too short for pink and the like.

Lattegirl: Thanks! These smirking hands do, indeed, belong to me.

Dude! Are those YOUR hands?

They are so full of character. I can almost see them smirking.

Wonderful.

On a second look, it appears as though her hands are perfectly placed if Jodi were attempting to "suck the chrome off a trailer hitch", a trait sought after by burly men found South of the Mason/Dixon line.

I'm sure her enthusiastic efforts would produce a sound similar to her calling out, "Bub-bah, bub-bah, bub-bah..."

Recently heard on a New York street:

"Up against the car, Maam"

"Yes, Officer."

"Hands on the hood."

"Yes, Officer."

"Now spread 'em."

"Ok, Officer, but I don't understand how splaying my perfectly manicured fingers will aid in what I hope will soon be a strip search with handcuffs..."

Very nice Jodi. I may have my pedicurist paint my toes RED tomorrow.

Keep stroking the mini, Jodi. Knowing how small things have no choice to grow when you apply your skillful manipulations, it will be a huge SUV in a few seconds.

And no matter how eco-friendly the owner is, any man would be pleased if you gave him a Hummer.

It's "Well Red".

What shade of Essie nail polish is that? I love it!

HAAA! Very cute!