How to Put Me to Sleep
Tell me about your dreams.
(Or try to.)
It's that simple.
No need to fix me a glass of warm milk. (I detest it anyway.) No need to parade sheep in front of me. No need to turn on C-SPAN.
Just say, "Let me tell you about this dream I had."
(You are not Martin Luther King, Jr.)
That is all.
fresh-baked at 07:47 PM
Minor Disclaimer: There are, of course, exceptions. For instance, a month or so ago, Aaron told me about a dream he had that was quite entertaining. But it was hilarious and didn't involve school, missing an important test, or forgetting to put on his pants.
The cast of Frasier was assembled in a haunted house, and al a Scooby Do were attempting to uncover the nasty villain toying with them. It was the red-headed she-devil, Nicole Kidman. And I had that one twice.
My dreams, if they don't involve me being chased, tormented, or confused, frequently appear as twisted versions of TV shows (and I don't watch much TV). I like to think that the above dream has some measure of truth to it, though.
Oooh! C-SPAN! Great idea!!!
Oh oh oh! My most interesting dream ever? I promise this is semi-entertaining.
Right before the D met my parents for the first time, I dreamt that we went to visit my parents who were apparently living at a marina.
So the gist of the dream is a big shark swam up and bit the D on his PENIS!
And my dad said, "Don't worry, it's only a flesh wound!"
Now then, go back to sleep.
i dreamed last night that my smoocher and i went out to dinner at a restaurant that charged $4 just to look at the menu.
Hey girl. I know exactly what you mean! Who wants to hear all of that boring crap! Listen to my dreams! They are pretty hot! LOLOLOL
I just love your blog too much. It's like you say what I'm thinking! It's like that show that used to be on when I was a kid...Wonder Twins! Wonder Twin powers, activate! LOLOLOL
anyway, you're so great. Keep it up, womyn!!
I had a very interesting dream last night.
I was going out with Tony Soprono, and we were having dinner, and everything was going great. We were talking and laughing, and he reached over to kiss me, and I told him I wanted to take things slow. He then proceeds to tell me that I dont know what Im talking about and being with me is the best thing I could ever do for my future. I start to run away because he is really scaring me, and I run home. I go into my house and the door wont shut, it just swings in the door frame, and Im screaming for someone to help me. I run into my brothers room, and I see smoke rising from him, and I ask him what he is smoking, and he replies..."myself." I wake up and am like "What the hell?"
I dreamt that ecstasy was legal(ized?). I bought some (which came in convenient "Al-toids"-esque container) at Safeway! "Minty fresh breath with half the brain cells!"
Oh how this was misinterpreted! I didn't want to hear your dreams, kids. That was the point!
These little gems are sure to cure even the most desperate of insomniacs, though, so perhaps they'll come in handy some night after all. If not for me, then for someone else. Gee ... if I can help even just one person in this world who suffers ...
Screw the dream stories. Try my nightmares. Most of them are about the end of the world, involve death, destruction, sometimes nuclear missiles and one particularly disturbing image of a burning toddler.
Ah, but Jodi, I think us teling you our dreams here is a perfect example of how everyone thinks *their* dream is interesting enough to change your mind! Excellent sociological experiment if you ask me (which you didn't...).
Altough I'm a day late,here's one that I recently had about The Daily Show:
(I hope it doesn't come off as teenyboppy)
Guys, you all missed the point.
She DOESN'T WANT TO HEAR ABOUT THEM.
Which bit of that concept weren't you all gettting? She even reiterated that point in the comments section, and yet still you spew forth about your dreams.
Return to your blogs. Nothing to see here. Move along.
... mmm.. what about dreams that involve you?? Or are you especially NOT interested in hearing about those?? :)
I'm right there with ya.. Boring. I'd rather hear about exotic, demented, surreal exploits that actually happened ...
It depends on the dream, LA, my sweet.
I am waaaaay more interested in hearing about real-life exploits, too.
I had a dream about this post...
Jodi and I were typing on this big keyboard, where we had to jump on the keys to get them to go down, only there was no "u" key, so we had to go and ask John Larroquette (TV's "Dan Fielding" from Night Court) if we could borrow his "u" only he didn't have one, so we had to play croquet against these talking llamas.